September

I am sitting on my back patio in the cool of the evening (did I just say that?  why yes I did!  so thankful for cooler temps!).  I am wearing my favorite comfy pants, my favorite hoodie, and I'm drinking a nice cup of hot tea, my favorite drink.  :)  I am all alone tonight.  My children are enjoying a Rangers' game with their PaPa and my husband is out for the evening (after cooking a lovely dinner for the family...he's the BEST!).  I cannot remember the last time I have had so many hours to myself.  My papers are graded, I watched my little sister's wedding video for the first time and cried at all the great moments of her day (sorry you haven't seen it yet, Rebekah, but this is just one of the perks of being the wife of the owner of the video company you hired!  :)  soon you will see it, I promise!!), and now, here I sit, with a moment to myself.  It's quite lovely, really. 

I can't believe that I am 4 weeks into a new job, and that my family and friends have heard me, with such wonderful listening ears, talk about the ups and downs of being a new teacher for a month now!  I keep promising myself I will figure out how to think about, dream about, talk about something other than this crazy adventure I have begun, but I must admit, it is quite consuming!  It's funny the things that go just the way you expected, and the millions of other things that don't!  But one thing is for sure, I am challenged in every way, and I am becoming better.  Not just a better teacher, although I hope that is true too, but a better person.  There is something about teaching and about being stretched beyond what I perceive I am capable of that sheds light on the inner parts of my heart and shows my true colors.  Some colors are beautiful, some are shades of grey, and some are colors that are just not meant to be worn.  I am learning that trying to do everything perfectly is completely futile, and I am realizing that there isn't an area of my life that will ever live up to a perfect expectation.  I can never be the perfect mother, never the perfect wife, never the perfect teacher, never the perfect organizer (far from it!), never the perfect friend, never the perfect sister or daughter, never the perfect me.  In this light, I feel vulnerable and a little scared, but I have also never felt so close to something really great, something so full of purpose. I am realizing that though perfect I will never be, fully loved, accepted, and redeemed am I right now.  There is a God who loves me and who thinks amazing things about me, believes in me as if I'm flawless, and has made available to me all of His love, creativity, joy, peace, grace, and abundant life.  The amazing thing is that if I would live in the full knowledge of that kind of love and acceptance, I wouldn't have to mourn my imperfection with every mistake.  I would be confident, secure, and happy, and ultimately, I would be a better me.  

2 Corinthians 9:8

The Message (MSG)

 ^8-11God can pour on the blessings in astonishing ways so that you're ready for anything and everything, more than just ready to do what needs to be done. As one psalmist puts it,

   He throws caution to the winds,
      giving to the needy in reckless abandon.
   His right-living, right-giving ways
      never run out, never wear out.
This most generous God who gives seed to the farmer that becomes bread for your meals is more than extravagant with you. He gives you something you can then give away, which grows into full-formed lives, robust in God, wealthy in every way, so that you can be generous in every way, producing with us great praise to God.

Who am I?

I was reading in The Message today, and was so moved by the love that God has for me (for all of us!).  Who am I that the Maker of all things should care about the details of my life?  Who am I that He should have a purpose and a plan for my life?  I'm just one person of little significance to the world, one who has made more mistakes than I even realize, one who sees so little in the big picture of life.  Yet, I am of great significance to the One who knew me before I even existed.  He knows me--all of me, the REAL me, to my very core--and somehow, miraculously, He takes joy in me, DELIGHTS in me, even more than I take joy in my own children!  Impossible, yet completely true. 

I cannot begin to recount all the ways God has orchestrated the details of my life, all the prayers He has answered in his faithfulness to me, all of the desires of my heart that He has fulfilled.  There is no area of my life that remains untouched...my health, my marriage, my children, my family, the direction of my life, my joy and contentment, my friendships...all of my needs are met in Him.  Regretfully, there are times when I do not acknowledge His active presence in my life,  yet He remains...steady, constant, patient, full of love and grace.  In my life, there have also been many disappointments, many times my heart has been wounded in ways I felt were beyond repair, many times I have not understood the sovereignty of God, times of darkness where I have not seen the light of truth.  But He always finds me, even when I have fallen into the deepest of pits, and He never fails to lift my broken soul and mend its every part. 

The past 2 1/2 years have been very challenging for me. I have been stretched in ways I have never been before.  But I have seen the very hand of God extended before me, leading me, pulling me along, carrying me when I could not stand, opening doors for me, shutting doors that needed to be closed, and drawing me into His embrace at the most unexpected times. I do not deserve such love; I have done nothing to earn it and everything to be unworthy of it.  But how can I not accept it when it is so freely, so abundantly, so generously, so surprisingly, so endlessly given? 

 What is man and woman that you bother with them;
      why take a second look their way?
   You made them not quite as high as angels,
      bright with Eden's dawn light;
   Then you put them in charge
      of your entire handcrafted world.

When God put them in charge of everything, nothing was excluded. But we don't see it yet, don't see everything under human jurisdiction. What we do see is Jesus, made "not quite as high as angels," and then, through the experience of death, crowned so much higher than any angel, with a glory "bright with Eden's dawn light." In that death, by God's grace, he fully experienced death in every person's place.

 ^10-13It makes good sense that the God who got everything started and keeps everything going now completes the work by making the Salvation Pioneer perfect through suffering as he leads all these people to glory. Since the One who saves and those who are saved have a common origin, Jesus doesn't hesitate to treat them as family, saying,
   I'll tell my good friends, my brothers and sisters, all I know
      about you;
   I'll join them in worship and praise to you.
Again, he puts himself in the same family circle when he says,
   Even I live by placing my trust in God.
And yet again,
   I'm here with the children God gave me.

 ^14-15Since the children are made of flesh and blood, it's logical that the Savior took on flesh and blood in order to rescue them by his death. By embracing death, taking it into himself, he destroyed the Devil's hold on death and freed all who cower through life, scared to death of death.

 ^16-18It's obvious, of course, that he didn't go to all this trouble for angels. It was for people like us, children of Abraham. That's why he had to enter into every detail of human life. Then, when he came before God as high priest to get rid of the people's sins, he would have already experienced it all himself—all the pain, all the testing—and would be able to help where help was needed. 

Hebrews 2:5-18 (The Message)

summer

It would seem like summer is the best time for a blogger to blog, but for me, it seems like the more free time I have the more lazy I become!  When things are busy, I am more productive and more creative; when life slows down, I just go with it!  As Travis puts it, I am the queen of ebb and flow.  But it seems that as August (and the upcoming school year) is quickly approaching, I should write about some of the highlights of my summer.  In June, our family took a trip to Kenya, East Africa.  While we were there, we attended a pastor's conference (see www.missionbarnabasint.org for more details!):



We also went on a family safari expedition, during which we saw so many animals, including the "big five" (lions, leopard, elephant, buffalo, rhinoceros).  We stayed in a luxurious tented safari encampment with fabulous food, beautiful animals wandering the grounds, traditional Masaai entertainment, and a great pool for the girls to enjoy in the 80 degree weather!  This is not your average summer vacation!  :)



Travis and I celebrated 15 wonderful years of marriage on the coast of the Indian Ocean.  We spent 3 days reading, eating, and napping under palm trees on the beach, taking evening strolls to dinner, and simply enjoying the time away with each other.  I was reminded, as I have been so many times through our years together, of the many reasons I fell in love with my husband.  Quite simply, he is my best friend, and he loves me more than I could ever deserve! 



In addition to our wonderful family trip, we have enjoyed many moments with friends, soaked up lots of sun at the pool, and have had a really great summer spending time together and taking joy in the small things in life!  Soon it will be time to get the girls back into school mode, Madeline in the 7th grade and Clara in the 2nd.  It is hard to believe how fast time goes by; I have been reminded this summer how important it is to create family memories, to have shared meaning and family culture, and to soak up the moments of life, love, and laughter! 

Enjoy the rest of your summer!

Legacy

This weekend we celebrate Father's Day, and I am so full of love for the Dad's in my life.  I am far away physically from my Dad this year, but never closer in heart.  Ray Ellis is my Dad and my hero, a mentor, a friend, a confidante, a life coach, and the greatest picture of God's love a daughter could have.  I have gained a wealth of wisdom from my Dad about grace, loyalty, family, and unconditional love.  Throughout my life, he has believed in me and encouraged me to chase my dreams and work hard to achieve them.  He has supported me through tough decisions, sacrificed for me, and loved me when I felt unlovable.  My dad has taught me how to love people and to care about the little details in the lives of others.  He is always asking people questions and making them feel like the most important person in the world.  He is the most patient person I know.  I have childhood memories of his detailed explanations in answer to my unending questions about his job, or sports, or his childhood memories, or his experiences in the war.  He seemed to never tire of teaching me about the principles of life, and those lessons have remained in my heart.  My dad is also "Granddad" to my daughters, and he would do anything for them.  They are drawn to his gentle spirit, and it fills my heart to know that they are blessed beyond their comprehension by his love.  I owe a huge debt of gratitude for the legacy of love, faithfulness, and godliness that my Dad has provided for my children.  THANK YOU Dad, for being YOU!  I love you!

I have another Dad in my life, my father-in-law, Ronnie Matheny.  I'm not sure if he knew what he was getting when I married into the family, since he had two sons and no daughters until I came along.  I am sensitive and quiet, yet opinionated and strong willed.  I am serious and deep, and I have a different sense of humor, so I don't always get his jokes!  But I am loved and accepted by my second Dad...of that there is no question.  I have been supported and encouraged in every way, and there have been countless times when I have received from him words of inspiration and wisdom for life.  My father-in-law is a missionary to Kenya, and this week, I have experienced first hand the impact of his ministry to pastors in East Africa.  He pours out his life for the benefit of others and is a shining example to me of how to truly live.  I am incredibly thankful for the father he is to his sons.  By his example, my husband learned what it means to be man, a husband, and a follower of Christ.  I am reaping a lifetime of blessings because of his influence.  Though he is very busy with many important things, he always finds time for his family.  He is "PaPa" to my children, and two little girls could not be more loved and spoiled.  They get quality time in addition to treats, gifts, and special events with their PaPa.  I feel privileged to be a "Matheny" and to be a small part of the family legacy. 

I could not write about Father's Day without paying tribute to my husband, Travis.  I have been married to him for 15 years, and I have grown to love him more and more with every year that passes.  He is an amazing husband and the most incredible dad to our children.  When I married him, I could only imagine the great dad he would one day be; he has far surpassed my expectations and has gone beyond what I could even imagine I wanted for my girls.  He loves his daughters with a fierce kind of love, always protecting them from things that would cause them harm.  But he also knows the value of allowing our children to experience risk and the pitfalls and triumphs that come with it.  He supports them, encourages them, and loves them unconditionally, and because of their father's love, they are strong.  My daughters are unique and Travis encourages them and inspires them to be themselves and to be different.  We are here in Africa, and my children act like we are just across the street instead of across the ocean.  I love that because of their Dad, they will grow up chasing after life instead of sitting around waiting for life to happen to them.  My children are blessed.  They will grow up knowing what it means to truly know a Father's love, and I cannot thank my husband enough for the man he is to me and my children. 

This Father's Day, I hope that the Dads in my life realize how special they are to me!  Thank  you for everything you do and all that you are!

Reunion

I do not have the perfect words to describe how it feels to me to be in Kenya at this moment.  Our family arrived here late last night, but for me the first REAL moments in Africa are the first moments of the new morning.  I LOVE waking up here, looking out my balcony window and not just seeing Nairobi, but FEELING it.

 

The beauty of the trees and flowers, the smell of the tangy air in my nose, the architecture of the homes and buildings, the peaceful quiet of the morning...the city welcomes me and I embrace it.  I remember my first experience in Africa 16 years ago (has it really been that long?!), and I remember waking up and peering out my window and feeling total awe at how far away from home I was and how different everything looked on the other side of the world.  I had never experienced any place outside of my own country, and to say that it was an eye-opening experience is a very large understatement.  Since that first time spent in Africa all those years ago, a piece of my heart has found a permanent home here, and it feels glorious to reunite with it now. 

Just jump in!

Today was a busy day.  This week has been a busy week!  It is the first week of summer break, and lots of things are happening!  I won't take the time to share all the details now, since I have already blogged once today, but I wanted to share a small treasure from my day.  Maybe it will enrich your life as it did mine. 

After having a very long day, my head was really spinning, but the girls (mostly Clara!) really wanted to go swimming at our neighbor's house where we are dog-sitting.  I really didn't feel up to going, but Clara can be quite persuasive.  So, without much energy for cooking, and since it was just us girls, we made PB&J sandwiches for the second time today, and went down the street for a picnic dinner and swim.  The girls jumped right in, and I was quite content to sit on the edge of the pool with all of my deep (and a bit overwhelming) thoughts.  I gave myself a pat on the back for conceding to the swimming adventure, when really I just wanted to be at home so that I could try to get some things sorted out.  Of course, it is pretty much impossible to hide your feelings around Madeline, since she is a magnet for emotion.  If I am anything other than perfectly and blissfully happy and stress-free, she will ask me about it and try to make it better.  She wants everyone to be as happy and care-free as she is all the time.  She asked me what was on my mind, and I told her my thoughts.  She pondered for a minute, and told me she had some good advice for me.  She said I should pray about it and remember that we're not supposed to worry about tomorrow.  And then she said, "Mom, you need to just jump in the pool.  Go ahead. You'll feel better.  You're supposed to ENJOY your day.  Do it now...JUST JUMP IN!"  In that second, I knew I had a choice.  I could brush her off and know that surely she would understand, because she KNOWS how much I only like to swim when the sun is beating down its 100 degree heat (and it was after 7pm...definitely not hot enough for me).  OR, I could jump in...not just so that my daughter felt her advice was needed and heeded...not just to encourage her in her own spiritual journey by validating her faith-filled advice...but BECAUSE IT WAS WISDOM, truth for my situation in more ways than she knew.  First, I knew it was right because as soon as I jumped in the chilly water, I felt more alive...then I knew it was right because in the moments after, while I played with my daughters in the pool,  I was living in the moment instead of sitting on the sidelines merely contemplating life...and now,I know it is right because I know what to do in the situation that I was hoping to sort out during my sideline contemplations...JUST JUMP IN!

Inspired

In just 4 days, my family and I leave for Nairobi, Kenya, East Africa! I am pretty excited! This is not a random vacation spot for us, although, we do plan to live it up while we are there...going on safari in the Masai Mara with the whole family, eating at Java House, leaving the kids with the grandparents while Travis and I celebrate our 15 year anniversary on the coast of the Indian ocean, visiting a twiga (the Swahili word for giraffe, which is the only word Clara uses for her favorite animal)orphanage, and all around having a wonderful family vacation! I cannot wait to post pictures!  But, more than all the fun we will have, this trip signifies something very special for our family. We are blessed to be a part of a legacy built by Clarence and Jewell Matheny and expanded by Ronnie and Debbie Matheny, my wonderful parents-in-law. I am so blessed to be a part of this family!  While we are in Kenya, we will be a part of the pastor's conference, which hundreds of church leaders will attend to receive training, personal ministry, and study materials.  Watch the video below to get inspired!



Now that you are inspired, here's what you can do:

Mission Barnabas has an opportunity to purchase Life Application Study Bibles in Nairobi and save hundreds on shipping costs from the U.S. Every $10 you donate will put a Study Bible in the hands of a pastor who does not have one. You cannot imagine the impact this will have on him and his church. Click the link below to sponsor a pastor today!

Special Sponsorship Opportunity: Give a pastor a Study Bible for $10!

Unique

If you are reading this blog, you will have to indulge me a bit to get through it!  Today, I am writing about my sweet Clara.  Yesterday after I dropped her off at school, as she was walking through the big metal front door, she lost her footing and the heavy door closed over her foot, slicing down the length of her pinkie toe.  Bleeding and crying, and pale white from the pain, she hobbled to the nurse's office.  Fortunately, the nurse said she did not need stitches, but she called me to come pick up Clara from school.  She could not walk and I was planning to carry her to the car, but the nurse offered her wheel chair, and Clara was a little cheered by that.  :)  She later told me that she had always wanted to ride in a wheel chair!  I took her home for about a half an hour, but it was yearbook signing day, so I brought her back to participate in that.  Once again, Clara was in the wheel chair, and apparently, first graders get instant celebrity status this way.  Clara signed so many yearbooks, and there was always a crowd around her, making sure she was okay.  I took her home after that, telling her teacher that surely she would be back the next day.  But, today is the last day of school, and Clara did not sleep well and was in too much pain to go to school.  Poor girl!  It is game day, and of all the school days to miss, the last day is not at the top of her list! We will try for an afternoon 1/2 day!  Because of all this drama, she is on my heart today, and I wanted to write about my special girl!  (Of course, my other daughter is super special, too, and I am sure to blog about her in the near future!)



I love my crazy Clara girl so much!  It is amazing to me how true to themselves children are.  As a baby, Clara established herself as a unique individual, and very different from her big sister, and I love that uniqueness!  She was not an "easy" baby, she was not quiet, and she was not easily entertained!  But she was full of life, she had a big belly laugh, and she took in everything that was going on around her.  She was slow to warm up to people, but when she gave you her affection, you knew it was special and from her heart!  Once you won her over, there was no turning back!  As a toddler, our little C.J. was into EVERYTHING!!  I never had to put child locks on cabinets when Madeline was little, but even with child locks, Clara found ways to get into bad things!  I have story after story of calling poison control, calling 9-1-1, and chasing after her pajama-clad little body as she raced from the house down the sidewalk!  Clara is 7 now, and she will be a 2nd grader next year.  I cannot believe it!  Now she reads chapter books, she finds educational videos to teach her about octopuses, geography, and technology...she just cannot learn enough to keep her mind occupied!  She loves facts, and she shares them with us daily, often teaching us a thing or two.  She is curious and likes answers!  Yesterday, as we were eating her homemade orange juice pops, she says "these popsicles are 100% fruit juice and have no added sugar, Mom."  Then after pausing and thinking for a moment, "Hey, Mom, I want them to prove to me that they are 100% juice."  I say, "Well, how should they prove it, Clara?"  She says, "Well, I guess we'll have to take a trip to their factory.  Because I don't think they squeeze it by hand...that would be a lot of oranges, and I'm pretty sure their hands would get tired.  But we could look at the machine, and make sure it is just putting fresh oranges into the juice."  Clara makes me smile! 

Thankful

I LOVE days like today!  I took the day off, which was a terrific decision!  This morning after my hubby took the girls to school, I had a delightful breakfast (steel cut oats with butter, brown sugar, a little salt, and a lot of blueberries...YUMMY!!!) and time of quiet reflection.  I shared with God all that was on my heart, and He filled my heart with peace and contentment.  I am truly a blessed woman!  In all of life's stress and craziness, sometimes it is easy to forget just how GOOD life is.  I have everything I need and so many things that are truly luxuries by the world's standards.  There are people all across the world who would look at my life and recognize great wealth, though to me, at times it may seem normal and "humble."  I was also reminded of the blessing today of FRIENDSHIP, as I had the privilege of spending some time with two of my close friends today.  I was encouraged, uplifted, and renewed by the love of friends!  I cannot imagine where I would be without them!  I often revel in the joy that my family brings me.  I love being a WIFE and a MOTHER.  They are my two favorite roles in life!  Don't get me wrong, I also love being a sister, daughter, teacher, and friend, but to me, nothing compares to marriage and parenthood.  Through my marriage, I experience love, hope, challenges, triumphs, laughter, anger, reconciliation, highs, lows, and everything in between.  I love my husband, and I am so honored to be his wife (for 15 years now!!).  As a mom, I pour myself out for my children, and experience the tremendous joy as well as the painful heartache that comes from loving someone so deeply and so fully.  My CHILDREN are a TREASURE to me!

The past few weeks I have thought a lot about GRATITUDE and perspective, and as I have focused on the positive, the good and not the bad or discouraging, I have been renewed.  I will confess that I am not always a positive person.  In fact, for most of my life, I have been one of "those" people, who call themselves a "realist," which is often code for pessimist!  But I want to live my life looking for the bright spots, not focusing on the darkness or even the "reality" of the situation at hand. If I based my life upon how circumstances appear, it would be a pretty sad life at times! It is hard when circumstances look grim, but I have a choice in each moment to take the very BEST from life and to leave the rest behind. 

So let me share some of the BEST MOMENTS from my life recently...spending the day with my girls on Saturday, shopping at the farmer's market, getting treats at Starbucks, shopping some more, and eating Taco Bueno in the car...watching my precious niece open her birthday gifts with adorable words of delight at her family birthday party...spending an evening with my in-laws, eating dinner at Zoe's Kitchen (LOVE Zoe's...you must try if you haven't already!), drinking a bottle of Kenyan wine, telling stories and laughing together (Yes, I am BLESSED to have in-laws with whom I love to spend my time!)...family date night consisting of snow cones, fresh Farmer's Market pasta and marinara and homemade bread, while watching a documentary on the Big Cats of the Masai Mara in Kenya, East Africa (where we are going in just a few short weeks!)...talking wedding details with my little sister who is getting married August 14 (SO EXCITING!!!)...cooking fresh, yummy food for my family tonight, experimenting with vegetables and experiencing success as my children ate them all!

Life is GOOD.  :)

Germanfest Fun!

We had a fantastic time at Germanfest!  The food, the hilarious entertainment, good friends, family fun!!  My favorite moments:

Watching the girls rock climb It was their first time, and both of them did great! Madeline, as you might expect, was fiercely determined and used her small size and freakish arm strength to cling to that wall like crazy! Clara was very rational about the whole thing.  She planned out her every move, and when she could see that her plans to move further up the wall were not going to be successful, she simply let go of the rope and said that was as high as she could go!

Watching Travis watch WWF wrestling (is that what it is called?)  He was having way too much fun!  He was quite literally giddy with delight.  It was quite theatrical, and I am not sure the girls and I really "got it" like Travis would have hoped for us to.  But to him, it was magical greatness!

Watching the "circus side show" with "Oops" the Juggler and the circus side show members Jacamo the magician, Pepe the multi-talented musician who played a recorder with his nose, and Ben.  Ben escaped from a "regulation straight jacket" (the announcer must have said that phrase at least a dozen times!) right before our very eyes.  It was a sight to behold.  Where-oh-where, I ask, can you receive such high quality entertainment??   :)  We certainly laughed a lot!

There were playgrounds to play on, live music to entertain us, bounce houses to jump in, rides to avoid, and lots of people watching to make the day fly by!  I can't wait until next year!  Maybe you can join us!

Random thoughts

I'm in a blogging sort of mood, but I've got all sorts of random thoughts going on in my mind this peaceful Saturday morning.  First, I am kind of excited!  Travis (and Kim Swindell...Kim, you are a superstar!!!) are participating in a cycling event in Muenster, TX today.  And the girls and I will be meeting up with him and the Swindell family to join all of Muenster at the Germanfest! It is sure to be an exciting, fun adventure, and I will be posting pictures later (that is, if I can figure out how). 

I've been in a summer sort of mood lately.  I am so ready for lazy afternoons at the pool, morning tea and toast on my back patio under the big shade tree, snow cones, vacations to Kenya, visits to Austin to see my lovely sister and her family, and just a general sense of calm.  I love summer, and somehow, even though the school year is not over yet, I am already getting into summer mode.  Perhaps it is all the fresh vegetables that I have been cooking with lately!  All of the culinary experts will cringe at the thought of any other alternative, but I have discovered the magic of cooking with fresh garlic.  (Actually, perhaps it does not take a culinary expert to cringe at the thought of using jarred garlic instead of fresh).  But honestly, I never thought it made much of a difference, and I am nothing if not practical, so jarred garlic has been a cooking staple around here for quite awhile.  But oh the taste of fresh!  I made a simple spaghetti dinner last night, and I sauteed 3 cloves of sliced, fresh, organic garlic along with the chopped Kale I always add to my sauce, and poured in the jar of Prego (yes I do see the irony of my jarred sauce paired with the oh so fresh garlic).  But oh wow, what a difference!  The garlic just permeated the sauce in a non-overpowering mild, sweet, garlicky sort of way. I also made some fantastic fresh green beans.  First I steamed them for about 5 minutes.  Then I sauteed them along with a couple of cloves of chopped garlic, a little olive oil, and some salt.  MAGIC!  I've never been very good at making green beans, but the garlic inspired me to try again.  Next I'd like to try roasting garlic.  I have heard it is fantastic, but I'm not sure how to do it.  Let me know your tips! 

Yesterday after getting a much needed adjustment from the wonderful Pam Kendall, I had about 20 extra minutes before I needed to pick up my 2 favorite daughters from school.  So what did I do? I made a mad dash into Plato's Closet (the little resale shop in the Albertson's shopping center on 377).  It has been a really long time since I have visited a Plato's Closet, and the location near me is relatively new.  So, I wasn't sure what to expect.  But, oh my!  I could have spent my entire DAY there!  It was like rummaging through a good (more fashionably dressed) friend's well organized closet and finding all sorts of things that she let me have for just a few dollars each!  I had only 20 minutes to shop, but I got a whole bag of clothes that I absolutely love!  I cannot wait to go back! 

I am feeling grateful today.  I have such a wonderful life filled with terrific people.  I have a husband who treats me like a queen, children who adore me (most of the time!), and friends and family who make up the community that I share life with.  I love them all so much!  I love my home and all of the memories and secrets it holds.  I love the quiet peaceful moments, and I also love the feeling I get after a long, busy, productive day.  I love the ebb and flow of my life.   

I've had a great week.  I have worked hard.  I have enjoyed my family.  I have enjoyed my time.  I have enjoyed my life!  I hope you have too!

First blog

I'm new at this blogging thing, but I often have thoughts I'd love to write down, or recipes I'm excited about (like the one I made tonight!), and ideas I'd like to share. Most of all, I just like to write.  So, if this blog is read by no one, it will at least provide an outlet for my thoughts and feelings, which I tend to write better than I could otherwise express them.

Today has been a beautiful day.  After working a half day and picking up my kids from school, which was a rare treat, the girls and I had lunch together and picked up a few things for a new recipe I wanted to try for dinner tonight.  After we got home, the girls played in the backyard for hours, entertaining themselves with our big tree in our miniature backyard and of course, their vivid imaginations.  If I could bottle Madeline's imagination, I am pretty sure it could fuel a rocket to the moon and back.  Yesterday, she helped me to create in my mind my very own made up animal, complete with a zebra striped dragon's head and a flower tail.  I did very little of the creating, because every time I would suggest something, she would ask me if I got the idea from somewhere else or if I made it up on my own.  Of course, all my ideas were from something I had seen before, so she suggested some original ideas to help me create my animal.  I wanted to name it Cosmo, but clearly that was not a creative name.  I can't even remember what we ended up naming it now, but it was definitely non-sensical and something Madeline totally approved of.  She said our first "imagination lesson" was a success, despite my obvious lack of skill.   Madeline inspires the kid in me and helps me see the beautiful in the small things in life.  She is perpetually positive and happy, and I have so much to learn from her! 

Clara helped me cook dinner tonight, which she often does.  We made pasta with homemade Vegan vodka sauce (recipe below), and it was truly delightful.  Sometimes when I cook, it is just about getting dinner on the table, but today it was about togetherness, quality time, and enjoying good food.  I love that!  For the first few months after our family decided to try out a (mostly) Vegan lifestyle, cooking became very difficult and it was something I dreaded.  I didn't know what to cook or how to prepare it or how to enjoy it.  My kids really struggled with the decision we were making for them, and meal time was not my favorite time of the day.  But Clara's love for cooking really helped her learn to try new things and appreciate the healthy ingredients we were using to make our food.  Now after a year of our new lifestyle, I love cooking Vegan, and my family loves eating the food I prepare.  I hope to use this blog to share new recipes I discover!  They are great for the vegetarian and non-vegetarian alike (at least I think so).  :)

Today, I sat in the branches of a tree with my daughters, I took a nap in the middle of the afternoon, I hung tissue pom poms from my daughter's ceiling, I "watched" baseball with my husband (while blogging, of course), I took joy in the small things; today I lived in the moment. 

Penne Vodka

2 tsp olive oil

4 cloves minced garlic

¼ tsp crushed red pepper

28 oz can crushed tomatoes

¼ cup Vodka

¼ tsp dried thyme

¼ tsp oregano

1 tsp sat

A few dashes of black pepper

½ cup sliced almonds

¼ cup finely chopped fresh basil

16 ounces penne pasta

Bring a pot of water to boil for the pasta .  Preheat the sauce pan over medium/low heat.  Add the oil, garlic, and crushed red pepper to the pan and sauté for about a minute, until fragrant, being careful not to burn.  Add tomatoes, vodka, thyme, oregano, basil, salt and black pepper.  Cover, and turn the heat a bit to bring to a simmer for about 20 minutes, stirring occasionally.  Meanwhile, add pasta to water and cook.

Once the sauce has simmered for 20 minutes, add almonds.  Use an immersion blender to blend the almond into the sauce until creamy and only slightly grainy.  (I do not have an immersion blender, so I just poured the sauce into a regular blender and pureed until smooth.)  Serve over penne pasta.  Enjoy! 

This recipe is fantastic when it is served with oven roasted asparagus.  Just trim fresh asparagus, place in a baking dish, drizzle with olive oil, balsamic vinegar, add a few dashes of salt and pepper, and roast in a 400 degree oven for about 8 minutes.  Delish!